What naughty words really mean

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mum calls the husband a 'bastard'

and then the dad calls the wife a 'bitch'

and billy goes to his mum and says 'mom what's a bitch and a bastard?'

and the mum says 'well, a bitch is a lady and a bastard is a gentlemen'

and then later billy goes outside and listens to his neighbors, and hears 'Put your penis in my vagina!'

So Billy goes to his mum and says 'mum whats a penis and vagina?'

His mum says 'Well Billy, a penis is a hat and a vagina is a coat'

and then later billy sees his dad shaving and cuts himself and says 'shit'

and billy said 'Dad, whats shit'

And then his dad says
'Well billy, shit is a type of Shaving cream '

and then billy goes to see his mum cutting the turkey and his mum cuts her finger and says 'fuck!'

and then billy says to his mum 'Mum whats fuck?'

'Well billy fuck is a way of cutting the turkey'

and Then later the guests arrive and billy goes to them and says

'Hello bitches and bastards, may i take your penis's and vaginas,
my dad's upstairs wiping shit off his face, and my mum is in the kitchen fucking the Turkey'